Monkey mechanics

So KEANE is coming to town in May! :) I’m excited! It’ll be my first non-classical, non-80s band concert! (Not that those symphonies and 80s concerts weren’t awesome!)

Since Curt doesn’t like Keane (he likes weird music), I will most likely be going by myself. I used to go to all sorts of things by myself; it’s been awhile, so I imagine I’ll be gunshy, but once upon a long time ago I wanted to go see Amos Lee play at the Galaxy, and nobody wanted to go with me, so I didn’t go and he hasn’t been back since and it makes me sad. Let that be a lesson to me!

I’m not an un-self-conscious person. Take my bike ride to work every morning. Let’s see if I can find that picture:

(I don’t wear the mask anymore, because it scratched my face.) But the helmet is still around. AND the bright orange safety vest. I hunch over my bike a little bit, and my unsightly belly chub makes itself entirely known to anyone who passes me in the 6.2 miles between our apartment and my work. At least once a week someone points at me and laughs. If I’m honest, this always hurts my feelings a bit. Then I tell myself I only care because it’s hardwired. I am, after all, a descendant of ancient socializing apes, with all the inherent social assholery that entails.

(And if I’m entirely honest, it’s not like, even if I never said so out loud, I have not ever made fun of how other people look. There’s that mean ol’ nasty ape again, bearing his nasty head. It takes a better person than me to rise entirely above that sort of meanness.)

I push myself to do these things that make me uncomfortable, because I know if I let myself be, I would almost always take the path of least resistance. It isn’t a good way to live. Taking a little risk now and then is good for the soul.

Of course, that doesn’t mean I’ll be bungee-jumping any time soon. Those people are fuckin’ nuts.

;)